I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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