I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
