You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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