Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
