I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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