she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
