so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize