That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
