I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
