Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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