Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
