My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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