Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
