There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
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