all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
