I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
