at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
