i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
