he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
