you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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