The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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