Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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