i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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