I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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