my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
