i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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