Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
