so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
