i think i have herpe
just one?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
