Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
