Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
