I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You made out with two different species that night
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
