I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
