I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
