The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
