Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
