just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
