ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
