Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
