I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Just invented taco cereal.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
