omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
