She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
