Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
