New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Randomize
