their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Randomize
