Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
