This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Found the puke drawer
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
