Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
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