we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
