How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
